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"Rebuilding Your Life"

by Rick Warren, (revised and adapted by Clancy Nixon)

September 4, 2005

Church of the Holy Spirit

Ashburn, Virginia

www.holyspiritdulles.org

The worst natural disaster in American history happened this week. The destruction

caused by Hurricane Katrina is devastating, and it is continuing. Thousands of people are

presumed dead. Hundreds of thousands lost everything they own. Damages run in the tens of

billions of dollars. Chaos descended on a great American city, New Orleans.

We are learning that to rebuild from Katrina, it will take years.

There's an entire book of the Bible about rebuilding a city; it's called "Nehemiah."

Nehemiah 2:17 and 18 says this: "Then I said to them, `You see the trouble we are in:

Jerusalem lies in ruins, and its gates have been burned with fire. Come, let us rebuild the wall

of Jerusalem, and we will no longer be in disgrace.' I also told them about the gracious hand of

my God upon me and what the king had said to me. They replied, "Let us start rebuilding." So

they began this good work." Thanks to Rick Warren for much of the content of this talk.

Note: rebuilding is "hard work. " It's much harder than starting from scratch! You

have to deal with all the damage first. Even more difficult than rebuilding a city is rebuilding a

life. The fact is, you can't live without loss. Loss is a part of life. The older you get, the more

losses you will experience. You're going to have storms of stress... floods of failure ... gusts

of grief... and torrents of tragedy.

Here in Ashburn we have been affected by the hurricane, too. Gas prices have gotten

out of hand. Look at the prices at this gas station.... (Arm/Leg/Firstborn Prices).

Sometimes we need to laugh, or we'd cry all the time. But seriously, when you've lost

everything, and you're in grief - you want to ask, "Why?" Why me? Most often, that question

is unanswerable. Some religious people are saying that Hurricane Katrina was God's judgment

on the decadence of New Orleans and the gambling barges of the Mississippi coast. While the

Bible tells us that God does judge nations, and he uses storms and wars to do so, we cannot say

for sure why Katrina happened. We're not going to know why on this side of eternity. It's

more helpful to ask, not why, but "What"? What should I do now that it has happened?

You cannot live without loss. If you haven't already faced a major loss - your turn is

coming. It's just a matter of time. When it happens, you'll need to take six steps to rebuild

your life.

RELEASE YOUR GRIEF

Loss always produces strong emotions: grief, fear, sadness, and anger. Those

feelings can be scary. Often we don't know what to do with them. The question for

us is, What does God want you to do with those negative emotions? Let's start with

what God wants you NOT to do. -Don't Resist them. Don't tell yourself, "I won't let

myself feel anything." That is not healthy, and it's not spiritual. Don't Rehearse

them if you rehearse your negative emotions, you'll torture yourself over & over.

Don't Minimize them Don't say, "It's nothing, I'll get over it." Pretending it

doesn't hurt, doesn't help. Don't Repress them - That's when you push your feelings

down inside. A lot of people are "stuffers." One day they explode! If you don't deal

with your feelings now, you will eventually! "When I swallow my feelings, my

stomach keeps score."

So what DO you do? You Release your grief and all your negative emotions - to God

in prayer! Psalm 62:8 says, "Pour out your heart to him, for God is our refuge." Jesus said it's

good to grieve. "Blessed are those who mourn..." So tell God exactly how you feel. He can

handle it! If you doubt that, read the psalms. In a storm you need a "refuge," and God wants

to comfort you. Don't turn from him, turn to him! The psalms are a great place to go when

you grieve.

2. RESIST BITTERNESS!

You must decide: Do you want to be bitter ...or get better? It's your choice- but you

can't be both. You are as joyful as you choose to be! It's a choice. As I watched Hurricane

coverage on TV this week, I was intrigued by the different responses that victims had to their

painful circumstances. Some people were just so grateful to be alive. Others were full of

anger and blame. The truth is, there is no correlation between life experiences and personal

joy! Many go through major losses and still stay positive; others become filled with self-pity

and complain the rest of their lives. We all know people like that. I used to practice law at

Freddie Mac, which really was a great place to practice. I know one lawyer there who found

something about the company to complain about every day. In America today, we have grown

a culture of entitlement, which has led to a culture of complainers. I wish that you could have

gone with me to Uganda, a place of serious poverty, where I heard not one person complain for

an entire week - except a Norwegian couple in a bank! Ugandans have much to teach us about

joy.

Let's recite Hebrews 12:15 together: "See to it that no one misses the grace of God and

that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many." When you hold a grudge

against someone, you don't hurt him; you are only hurting yourself. The Bible says, if you

don't forgive others, you are not forgiven. Bitterness defiles you, and it defiles others. So how

do you resist bitterness? First, Forgive. Just do it. Forgive those who wronged you; forgive

your parents; forgive your ex; forgive your boss; forgive God. Forgiveness is the key to

freedom. Don't remain in bondage to your past hurts. Freely you received grace; freely give it.

Second, Decide to Accept what cannot be changed. Much of life is beyond your control.

The only way to overcome some things is to accept them! Your past is past. Nothing will

change it now. "Faith" is facing the facts without becoming discouraged. Third, Focus on

what's left, not on what's lost. Find something to be thankful for. The truth is, many people

would love to have your problems, to trade you for theirs.

3. RE-EVALUATE YOUR LIFE

Disasters have a way of changing our perspective. They clarify our values. We realize

what matters most. Even committed believers can fall into this trap. If you measure your life

by the things you've accumulated (car, clothes, possessions), & one day those things are all

taken away, it forces you to reevaluate what life is really all about! If your definition of family

is tied to your house or yard or neighborhood & suddenly it's completely destroyed, it forces

you to re-think the true meaning of a family. In hard times it's clearer to us: The greatest

things in life aren't things! 1 TIM. 6:7,8 says, "For we brought nothing into this world, and

we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that."

There's only one way to have real security: Build your life on that which can't be taken away.

Think about what can be taken away: You can lose a home ... career...your health ... youth ...

clients ... beauty ... a loved one. What you cannot lose is God's love for you.

Jesus promised: "I will NEVER leave you nor forsake you."

RECEIVE HELP FROM OTHERS

God never intended for you to go through life without help. We were created for

community. In the Garden of Eden, God said: "It is not good for man to be alone." If you're

going to rebuild your life after a loss- you must allow others into your life! Many times, you

need to invite others in; to ask for help. In New Orleans right now, people are painfully aware

of how dependent they are on others to rescue them. The truth is, they are going to need others

for a long time while they rebuild. When we're in pain- often we isolate ourselves. Men, we

can go into our caves and stay there emotionally. Big mistake! You need the support &

perspective of other people. This is why, here at CHS we stress finding & then joining a

church family. You have relationships in place before the crisis comes! You need: God's

Presence... God's Promises... God's Power... and you need God's People! I invite you to join

our church family. Take Class 101, Alpha this fall. 10 Friday evenings, starting September 30.

Class 102 is our Membership class a single morning on October 15. You also need to join a

small group. The best place for support is a Small Group! Look in your announcement

bulletin pull it out - every week we list our small groups where they meet, what they do.

Join a group this fall. If you have not taken Alpha yet, do that first you'll get a group on

Alpha. After Alpha, find a group.

5. REACH OUT TO HELP OTHERS

Helping others is a way to rebuild your own life. It works. That's not the main reason

we do it we help others out of gratitude for all God has done for us. We are blessed to be a

blessing. But remember the law of sowing and reaping. It means that if you sow generously

into others lives, you will also reap generously. In God's economy, we get our own needs met

when we meet the needs of others. I gave you a pumpkin colored handout today to give you a

few ways you can help the hurricane relief effort from right here in Ashburn. This is from the

Anglican Communion Network. You can pray; you can give money, and you can be involved

with helping those who serve. Kelly Rodriguez had a great idea for us to encourage FEMA

workers. We can bake cookies and write notes for the exhausted local FEMA workers who are

fielding calls for assistance from the Gulf Coast. We will write those notes in a moment.

Anyone who'd like to help in other ways can meet after the service right here by the Altar, and

we will discuss ways we can help.

6. RELY ON THE LORD

Let me be clear: You cannot rebuild a healthy life without God. You must build on a

firm foundation. People on the Mississippi Coast had taken precautions in their building plans

by doing things like building on stilts, using pilings driven into the sand. When Katrina blew

into town, those homes were pulverized just like the rest. We've now learned that the levees in

New Orleans were designed to withstand a category 3 hurricane, but not a category 4 or 5!

Little did we know that New Orleans motto, "let the good times roll" was rolling the dice not

just for good times, but for disaster. When a category 4 storm comes into your life, you need

more than category 3 protection. You need the only sure foundation, and that is The Lord

Jesus Christ. Amen?

I tried other solutions. I tried existentialism; I tried TM; I tried Buddhism; I tried

Marxism; I tried career success as a Lawyer at a Wall Street firm; I tried the bohemian

lifestyle; and with all these, when storms came, my foundation just crumbled. It's like I had no

footing. I have since found that nothing but the blood of Jesus was secure and firm enough to

carry me through. I was so confused and lost in sin, nothing could have saved me

but grace. I've learned to rely on the Lord. He is the mighty cornerstone. I lost my six figure

income as a lawyer to go to seminary to become a pastor. My starting salary as a deacon was

$29,000 a year. Because we serve a mighty God, our God provides all my needs. That's my

God. He is a rebuilding God. Do you know him? Do you rely only on him?

If you find yourself stuck asking, "Why?" about the disaster, you are looking at God

through your problems. God wants us to look at our problems through him. God is good. All

the time. and All the time, God is good. Don't fix your eyes on the mountain of your problems;

fix your eyes on the mountain mover.

I'm going to suggest that we pray together now and ask God to help us rebuild our

lives. Let's pray.

"Dear God, I've messed up a lot a things in my life, and I've had some losses. Today I want to

start the rebuilding process with you in charge. I pour out my heart to you. You know how I

feel better than anyone. I need you in my life. I don't want to be a bitter person. I want to be a

better one. Please forgive me for not trusting you and for hurting others. Help me forgive those

who've hurt me. Help me remember that life is not about accumulating things, but fulfilling

your purposes for me. I want to let go of my pride and fear that has kept me from letting others

get close to me. Help me get into a small group. Most of all Jesus, teach me to rely on you

moment by moment. I do believe that you are the only sure foundation. In Jesus' name.

Amen."

Now I'd like us to respond by writing a note of encouragement to a FEMA worker here in

Loudoun County. On the screen you'll find some things you can say. Please pull out note

cards and pens now. If you need a pen, please raise your hand.

REBUILDING YOUR LIFE

by Rick Warren, revised by Clancy Nixon

Sept. 4, 2005

"I (Nehemiah) said to them, "You know full well the tragedy of our city. It lies in ruins, and its

gates are burned. Let us rebuild the wall of

Jerusalem and rid ourselves of this disgrace!" "Then they said, `Let's start rebuilding! 'So they began

to work hard." Nehemiah 2:17, 18

6 STEPS TO REBUILDING YOUR LIFE

RELEASE ______________________________

"Pour out your heart to him, for God is our refuge."

Psalm 62:8b (NLT)

RESIST ______________________________

"Watch out that no bitterness takes root among you...

it causes deep trouble, hurting many in their spiritual lives."

Hebrews 12:15 (LB)

RE-EVALUATE ______________________________

"We brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of

it."1 Timothy

6:7 (NIV)

RECEIVE ______________________________

"...Since we are all one body in Christ, we belong to each other,

and each of us

needs all the others." Romans 12:5 (NLT)

REACH OUT ______________________________

"By helping each other with your troubles, you obey the law of

Christ."

Galatians 6:2 (NCV)

RELY ON __________________

"Come back to God Almighty and he'll rebuild your life."

Job 22:23a (Mes)